How? One of the most direct ways is though meaningful, timely and regular feedback from people who will be honest with you and with whom you share mutual trust and respect.

Ask for the feedback. Be open in wanting to know and learn from their opinions. Some examples:

“what am I doing that I should continue?” “what do I do well?’
“what could I do differently (please be specific)?”
“what should I consider stopping because it gets in the way, is annoying, isn’t effective?”
“what would be helpful for me to learn?” “who else can help me learn what I need to learn?”

Give people an opportunity to provide the feedback face-to-face, on the phone or in writing, whatever is easiest for them.

Of course you then need to do something with that input.

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When I read Drive, it really hit a cord with me, particularly the chapter on purpose. Daniel Pink states, “we’re designed to be active and engaged. And we know that the richest experiences in our lives aren’t when we’re clamoring for validation from others, but when we’re listening to our own voice – doing something that matters, doing it well, and doing it in the service of a cause larger than ourselves.”

It’s quite common that at some point in life we ask, “what is my purpose?” And we strive to find the answer. The answer may not come for a while and it may change with life experience and time. Coming to an answer often infuses us with renewed energy and hope. For me it also brings clarity of what, with whom, how, when and why to spend my precious time and energy. Purpose also gives me courage.

I’m not sure which comes first purpose or courage. It probably doesn’t matter. What does matter is that leaders all need courage. And leaders all need purpose. Together, they enable leaders to see and set the vision, refine direction and allows them to guide others. Purpose fuels us.

When I take action that is aligned with my purpose, I am in creative flow, it’s practically effortless and I’m happy, productive and fulfilled. I am at my best, performing optimally.

If you want to be at your best, clarify your purpose and make choices and decisions that match it. It works.

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If you have the desire to improve, you probably want to know what you can do…

In addition to deliberate practice, practice and more practice, you need to know how you’re doing and what you can do to improve. You are looking for more self-awareness. That means seeking feedback on an on-going basis.

Set up the conversation with a variety of people you trust to be honest and that know you, but also ask people that think differently than you, diversity of thought, experience and background is helpful. Explain that you are on the road to mastering something (XYZ) and you are seeking feedback to help you get there. Ask these questions on a regular and frequent basis (perhaps weekly or monthly):

“What am I doing well to get closer to mastering XYZ?”
“What could I do differently to be better at XYZ?”
“What other feedback do you have that may be helpful in my mastering XYZ?”

Thank the person genuinely and get to work on putting that feedback into motion. As you take action, ask for more specific feedback and continue refining your behaviors and actions.

Be prepared that the road to mastery can be long and potentially painful. It will serve you well if you have a “learning” mindset and take small baby steps toward your goal of mastering XYZ.

Mastery requires concerted effort. Be one of the minority that has the energy and focus to stay the course. The payoff of your leadership will be great.

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Drive says that for 21st century work, we need to upgrade to autonomy, mastery and purpose. This is assuming you strive for optimal performance.

I had not thought too much about it before, autonomy that is. I am fortunate that for most of my working life, I have had a fair amount of it, so I have not spent much energy thinking   about it. And somehow it seemed like the right thing to do when leading people, so  that is the approach I’ve taken. But these days the whole concept of autonomy is right in front of me. I get to see what it means as my young child wants to do this, that, and so-and-so himself. “I can do it, by myself. No, I want to do it (don’t help me, Mommy).”

And if we start out this way as toddlers, why then is that not the case for many in the world of work? Of course there are standards to meet and for some types of work there is a “proper” way to do things that doesn’t allow for too much autonomy. But for much of the work today, autonomy is the way to go if you want to the person doing it to really be “into” what s/he is doing and the result to be higher, better performance.

Drive says that we have a default setting (like my toddler) and that is to be autonomous. That is, when people have self-direction over what they do (the tasks), when they do it (the time), how they do it (the technique) and who they do it with (the team), they and you get big payoffs.

We all want to outperform yesterday and I’d add, our competition. Autonomy is one way to make it happen.

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If you are leader, read this book NOW and look at what you’re doing in your workplace. You may be sabotaging your employee’s best performance while trying to maximize it. And the reward system you have in place may be keeping you from your optimal performance as well. I’m sure that’s not your intention.

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I once heard that the elite Navy Seals train with the philosophy of Go Slow to Go Fast. Slow is a relative term. The idea is that if we focus on doing something correctly and thoroughly the first time, it actually allows us to go faster in the end. It makes sense that when you only have one chance to get it right, you better be or lives may be lost.

I can’t say whether the Navy Seals do live by this idea, but it has made a positive difference for me. When I am self-aware and focus on slowing down, being more thoughtful about each moment and action and step, I get more done and feel less  stressed. I repeat “go slow to go fast” in my mind and my breathing becomes less shallow, more full-in-the-belly breathing which health experts tell us lowers stress hormones.

Research shows that leaders directly influence the work environment, the emotional climate of the workplace by about 70%. That in turn affects bottom line results in the range of 20-30%. You have the capability and responsibility to be self-aware and to make a positive impact on those you work with (not to mention those you live with).

Leaders can get more done, be less stressed and set a good example by going slow to go fast.

Let me know if it works for you.

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In a previous post, I talked about the importance for leaders to have an early warning system. Ideally, a leader anticipates, is proactive and also has an early warning system. This combination enables a leader to have foresight and be ahead of the curve, and can be the saving grace for those situations where the leader did not anticipate as well as she could, to assess and act quickly. An early warning system is a tool. But having one isn’t enough. The leader needs to use the information to weigh the situation or issue and take action which can impact the person and team’s optimal performance.

A business owner and I were talking about an employee that isn’t meeting the leader’s expectations. One of the pieces of this leader’s early warning system is sales goals. The employee we were discussing has not met his sales goal for two months. Month one of missing the goal was a yellow flag. Month two was red flag.  Now, the employee is potentially going into dangerous territory. He has to turn things around.

Th leader explained that at the end of month one, he asked the employee what he could do to help. They agreed on some specific steps they each would take and checked-in with each other over the next few weeks. Unfortunately, that wasn’t enough. At the end of month two, sales had not improved and the two met again. The employee said he’d try harder. The leader said he was there to help. Again, that was not enough change.

I recommended that the leader and employee discuss and assess the four areas: knowledge +  ability + skills + motivation to understand what is happening.  I think of knowledge as the  knowing why, what, how, when and with whom, it includes the theoretical and book learning parts. You can have knowledge without ability or skill or motivation. Ability is sometimes innate, sometimes developed; it usually is demonstrated by a person being able to do XYZ.  Just because you have an ability does not mean you have a high level of skill. In using skills here, I am referring to a person having a high level of skill in executing a strategy or action; the person does something well or very well. Motivation used here is about whether a person has the motivation to take action, whether intrinsic or because of an external reason. He wants to apply what he knows, using his ability with a lot of skill.

The conversation will require self-awareness on both the leader and employee’s parts. And depending on what comes from the talk, they then can fashion an appropriate action plan quickly.

What are your thoughts or experience?

Come back to see what transpires next.

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Let’s look at her behaviors and actions:

Encouraged and promoted open communication

- Faye was honest and transparent and fostered that in return. You knew where she stood and what she expected. She shared her reasoning, thoughts and feelings. There were no hidden agendas or mixed messages. She created an environment where people truly felt they could express an opinion and it would be considered, even if it differed from hers. Faye asked for regular feedback and gave it freely, both complimentary and constructive. When she couldn’t take an action that was requested, she explained why and it made sense. She communicated clearly and thoroughly; the receiver really got the message that she intended.

Reliable and consistent

- Faye kept commitments and held herself and those she worked with accountable. She had high integrity. There were no surprises or broken promises. She was good at following-up. When she couldn’t take an action that was requested, she explained why and it made sense.

Respectful to all

-Faye was fair and had no hidden agendas. She really valued diversity. She enhanced people’s self-esteem.

Showed confidence in others

-Faye let people do their jobs by supporting them and getting out of their way. She invested in her team’s development, both individually and as a group. She coached and mentored. She advocated for her group and others. She shared leadership and she brought out the best in others.

Faye was and is a great leader and boss. And she still is one of the best leaders I know.

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Is it there until it isn’t? Can and do we relearn how to trust? How do we develop trust in ourselves, in one another and the larger world? Why is it that some of us are more trusting and why do we trust sooner than others?

In the 1950’s, psychiatrist Erik Erickson developed a model of social and emotional development. The process of socialization, the Eight Stages of Development start with learning basic trust vs. basic mistrust. This occurs in infancy through the first one or two years: the nurtured and loved child develops, trust, security and a certain optimism.

Back to today. We’ve been to this beach before, so familiarity made us both more comfortable. Comfortable enough to settle close to the shoreline and immediately play in the wet sand, about a foot above the line where the surf rolled in. Previously we would start in the dry sand quite a ways from the ocean and slowly make our way to the seashore over the course of an hour or so. Today, it was just a few minutes after our arrival that my son wanted to go in the water.

But the waves were a bit bigger and the tide was higher than our previous visits. We waded in a bit, holding hands. My son is not a huge risk taker, at least not yet. I’d say he is somewhat cautious. We were fine until the the third wave. It wasn’t much bigger than the others, it came up to his chest, but it was relatively bigger than what he was used to. He cried and we retreated. And that was the end of going in the ocean for today.

This made me wonder if he trusted me, himself, or even the waves until the situation proved to be different that he expected. And I’m wondering how much of today’s experience will impact our next visit.

This made me think about leaders who trust from the get-go until there is evidence not to vs. those that withhold trust until other people have earned it.

What do you think? What kind of leader are you? What kind of leader would you want to be lead by?

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This makes me recall a former boss. He had technical business savvy, but very little emotional intelligence. He lead by fear, not by cultivating trust. He bullied lots of people (this was before companies really paid attention to professional and civil treatment for all) . He did not care about building relationships. And forget about developing employees. It’s almost as though he had a “chew ‘em up and spit ‘em out” philosophy. People would shake in their boots when he was around. He did not admit mistakes and was good at blaming others. While his “get results through fear” had short-term impact, it could not carry the long-term business results the corporation expected. Trust was non-existent. No one wanted to go the extra mile. Turnover was at an all-time high. And in the end, he was terminated.

It was a great learning experience. One that showed clearly what not to do.

In contrast, another former supervisor invested in relationships and earning people’s trust. She was honest and transparent. She had high integrity and you knew where she stood and what she expected. There were no hidden agendas. She created an environment where people truly felt they could express an opinion and it would be considered, even if it differed from hers. It was safe, so people had more courage and took more (good) risks. She kept commitments. She asked for regular feedback and was good at following-up. When she couldn’t take an action that was requested, she explained why and it made sense. She communicated clearly and thoroughly; in other words, the receiver really got the message that she intended. She let people do their jobs by supporting them and getting out of their way. She invested in her team’s development, both individually and as a group. People excelled on her team and high performers from other departments wanted to work with her. People willingly gave more than was expected and had fun doing it. We’re talking lots of optimal performance. In the end, she was promoted, several times, to the highest executive level.

It was a great learning experience. It made me want to be that kind of leader because I experienced first-hand what it was like to work with someone like that. I was motivated to do my best and then reach further, to improve from there. It was invigorating and rewarding, not just for me but for people I interacted with also.

Most leaders fall somewhere in between these two examples. And most good leaders do some of the things outlined in the second story above, some of the time.

Here’s my challenge to leaders: what difference would you see in performance and then business results if you did all of the things to build and nurture trust, all of the time? If you don’t think it’s worth the investment, I guarantee you are not maximizing your team’s output, getting the best business results and for sure you are not getting optimal performance.

Try it and let me know…

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